As we observe the 16 Days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence, I'm reminded of the often-overlooked reality of domestic abuse against men. The world tells us that men can't be victims of abuse, that we're always the perpetrators. But I'm here to tell you that's a myth.
My marriage to Zanille was picture-perfect, or so it seemed. We had a beautiful wedding, and everything appeared normal. But behind closed doors, I endured physical, emotional, and psychological abuse.
Five months into our marriage, Zanille started complaining about various things. She wanted new clothes, accessories, and luxury items, despite having everything she needed. I tried to reason with her, but she became aggressive and accusatory.
The abuse escalated over time. Zanille would insult me, beat me, and humiliate me in front of our househelp. I was trapped in a living nightmare. I had no one to turn to, and I felt ashamed and embarrassed.
I confided in my friends Wilford and Simon, but they laughed at me and told me to "man up." They didn't believe me, and they didn't take my situation seriously.
I was afraid to speak out, afraid of being ridiculed or dismissed. But the abuse took a toll on my mental and physical health. I suffered from bruises, black eyes, and eventually, erectile dysfunction due to the physical abuse.
I tried to keep the abuse a secret, but it became too much to bear. I confided in my cousin Emily, who encouraged me to seek help. But when she confronted Zanille, it only escalated the situation.
The final incident occurred when Zanille poured hot water on me, leaving me with severe burns. I was hospitalized, and it was then that I realized I had to speak out.
As I write this from my hospital bed, I'm reminded that domestic abuse can happen to anyone, regardless of gender. It's time to break the silence and challenge the stereotypes that perpetuate this violence.
I may never fully recover from the trauma, but I'm determined to use my experience to raise awareness about domestic abuse against men. It's time to create a safe space for men to speak out and seek help without fear of judgment or ridicule.
Let's work together to break the silence and end the stigma surrounding domestic abuse against men."
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