In the depths of my unraveling, I'm tempted to surrender To the siren's whisper, a numbing, sweet thunder I'd trade the ache of awareness for the calm of the grave But the echoes of my heartbeat whisper, "You still crave". To breathe, to feel, to hurt, to rise, to fall The noose of my past tightens, a relentless, cruel call I'm suffocating under the weight of what I've done A prisoner of my memories, forever undone. The ghosts of my yesterday haunt me, a relentless crew Reminding me of the shards I've yet to glue I'm searching for a way out, a glimmer of light But the shadows they surround me, a perpetual night. In this darkness, I'm lost, a wanderer without a map The stars that once guided me, now just a distant trap I'm clingling to the fragments, the broken, shattered me Praying for a miracle, a chance to be set free. But what if the weight of my chains is what keeps me tied? What if the pain is the only thing that m...
People said Kude was focused. He liked it that way. To him, focus meant silence around his decisions, silence around emotions he did not want to manage, and silence from people who expected more from him than he was willing to give. Kude believed feelings were inconvenient. Not feelings in general; just the ones that came from others when they became complicated. He dated women, but he did it like someone selecting useful arrangements for a life already planned. If a woman had money, he stayed close. If she was kind and emotionally available, he enjoyed the comfort without asking himself whether he was giving the same back. He liked being treated well. Like a king sitting quietly in a palace he never built. He expected respect, attention, and small sacrifices — the kind people make when they care about someone. But when a woman tried to express what she felt, Kude's expression changed. He would listen without really listening. Then he would say her feelings were st...
In the silence of my suffering - I met God. It wasn't just in the spotlight. It was on the hospital bed, In the middle of the marital crisis, when the bank account hit zero, and when depression and anxiety couldn't lift; that was when I met Him. Not too loud, but real. Not flashy but faithful. He never waited till I was strong; He just showed up. All Gentle - Quiet - Present - Comforting. Not everything was fixed overnight but He gave me a deeper - kinder present; His peace - His nearness. In those moments of desperation, I realized that God's presence isn't about grand gestures or dramatic interventions. It's about His gentle whisper in the darkness, His comforting presence in the midst of pain. It's about finding solace in His nearness, even when everything else seems to be falling apart. As I reflect on those moments, I realize that God's faithfulness isn't dependent on my circumstances. He's not a God who's only present in the good ti...
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