I got married to Zoto 2years and a half ago. Our wedding was colourful and was the talk of the town. We even featured in the magazine of the Most Top Weddings of the Year; Everything about our wedding was awesome- from the attire, the deco, the catering, the make up etc. It was remarkable and unforgettable.
Zoto and I lived so well and I was so comfortable with him, he stopped me from my Nursing job and suggested I start a business, I ventured into China-Japan-Italy cosmetics.
21months into our marriage which I perceived to have been a happy home I started hearing rumors that Zoto had a mistress which he had bought a duplex for and was financially supporting so much. They said she was a Communications student who was on an internship program at one of his companies; Well, Zoto owned media houses around the country and was in partnership with most of the largest international media films. He was a big boy.
At first, I chose not to believe the rumors of him and his mistress but after 3months or so, I got surprised with how Zoto's attitude was. He was drained and emotional and seemed traumatized most of his time. We stopped having sex as a couple and he just didn't seem interested in me anymore. I tried finding out what was wrong with him but he kept ignoring me. He stopped doing evaluations and monitoring his companies and spent his time home drinking whiskey.
I went back to my old source who told me about his mistress and I was shocked to learn that the girl had died in a hit-and-run. Wheeewww! What a world. So my husband was bitter all along because his mistress had died?
I got back home, racing on if it was right to confront him and be supportive or fight him and leave the marriage.
I was too drained to think that the man I innocently loved and purely made vows with was traumatized and broken hearted because his mistress was dead.
I summoned courage and decided to engage a heart to heart talk with him, I was already getting tired of his midnight sobbings and all-day crying.
He immediately bursted into tears like a baby whose toys had been taken away from him after I asked him about his dead mistress. I was pissed but I chose not to react. I know this is the moment where most women would jump on their husbands and get it all dirty but I left him to grieve all he could.
From that day till a couple of months ago, I honestly should say my marriage wasn't that great. He kept mourning that girl and said he wish she never died and that he wish he never got to know her; maybe if he didn't hire her as an intern she would have lived.
I found it so hard to be emotionally supportive with how his attitude towards the whole incident was, and then I wonder how special the girl was that he seriously couldn't get over the loss and make our marriage work.
A part of me wanted to leave the marriage and another side didn't want to with the fact that I found out I was 2months pregnant by then.
As I am writing my broken pieces story, I am also excited to say I worked on my marriage to more than it was. I decided to do everything my own way and ignored Zoto's grief over his mistress' death. I gave him a cold shoulder and silent treatments until he realized his mistakes, got back to his senses and was certain with our marriage.
I was broken in the process-at times I would lock myself in the toilet and cry-chant into prayers and slap my face to wake up to reality. I thought it was all a dream that my husband was weary of the death of another woman in front of me.
I just didn't know why I was still living with him. I wasn't sure if I loved him or if I was confused.
Those that knew my husband's affair expected me to file a divorce and leave and wondered why I was staying back with a cheater.
I wanted out but I also wanted to stay, I knew there was more to it and here I am happy again with Zoto learning his lessons and vowing to never look the other way again.
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