"There's so much I wish to say, but it's so hard to put all the words together. I have searched for meaning in abandoned buildings and I am exhausted. I wonder if you know how regret follows me to bed every night. It's been a hell of life for me for the past few months. I have had the most craziest days and it overwhelms me to the core." Before Austin and I got married, I ignored the red flags which were there. His mannerisms, associations and preferences. I turned to a blind-deaf dog right from the thirteen months of our relationship and insisted on marrying him. I wanted an extravagant wedding and Austin made it happen, a beautiful home and some great sex, I knew Austin would offer and afford all that and more. We had sex several times and every single thrust was great. The way he handled me in bed made him earn my trust and loyalty. I mean this was the man I controlled in bed and made him groan and in return gave me all the pleasure I wanted. I was capable of t